Rapure Hit the Snooze Button, I Guess

Y'know, I don't quite like talking, pontificating as it were, about religion. I mean, If worshiping God or a broccoli spear makes you more comfortable in life, good on you and I wish you well. But I have to say a few things about this Harold Camping and his "prophesy" about the end of the world May 21, 2011.

I wouldn't mind so much, but it's all over the place, and why he decided the day after my birthday, I don't know. Probably distracted people from getting me sweet gifts, too. I even felt bad for those poor shlubs that spent all of their hard earned life savings on the "100% guaranteed" rapture date. And, as you can tell, by me typing this, It didn't happen as promised. I bet there's egg on somebodies face now, huh?

Yes, this ancient Rev Harold Camping, calculated some numerology tricks that told him somehow that the end of the world was happening Saturday May 21st 2011. Actually, what he promised was that on the 21st, all the "chosen people would go "poof" and be transported to heaven, the rest of us sinners will live till October 21st 2011 in utter torment till the earth blows up or turns into a Dr. Suess or Bizzarro world or something.

When nothing happened at 6pm as was predicted (And what time zone does God use anyway), I predicted the possible excuses he could use on his flock...

1.) Ha ha! This was a test of your faith!
2.) the rapture did happen1 don't you see it, non-believer?
3.) Due to our faith and praying, the event has been postponed until further notice. But it's gonna happen...
4.) What I meant to say was, it was the end of the old ways, and time for a new beginning with a bigger spiritual world. Good job, people!! We did it!

What I didn't expect him to say was...

5.) oops...sorry...I'm not a modern day prophet and I am sad and old, and probably had too much tank oxygen that day. Sorry, go about your lives and be happy...

And you know what?! Turns out I am a better prophet than Harold Camping!!!

Two days later, he came out in public and he chose excuses 1,2,3, AND 4. the 21st had the "expected" spiritual rapture as God chose that day for his judgement, then he's gonna sleep on it for a while till October 21st and do his mojo then. Oooohhhhh....and I thought Camping was just wrong.

I also predicted that although this is the second time he predicted wrong (the first in 1994) he's still going to have believers follow him somehow. At that point, I stopped feeling sorry for those who spent their life savings on Harold's words (he sure as hell doesn't feel bad. Even said on his radio program, it's not his responsibility as he never actually told these people to spend their money on his quest. But, he also didn't say not to. And he himself, said he wouldn't give up his home or car.)

I say, practice whatever makes you happy. No one is better than anyone else. Don't tell me what I believe in is the wrong religion while yours it right. I try to be good person , and that's my center. I don't need or want anyone like Harold Camping to place his USDA stamp of approval on the back of my hand so i can get into Heavens nightclub. It should be as simple as, you good= go to heaven, collect $200.

And if the rapture does come October 21st, I guess there'll be egg on my face and I should have gotten my hand Harold stamped. at least I'll be in good company and with lots of left behind pets. It'll be like My Little Pet Shop.

Be good humans.